Kraken My Heart

We watched this three times trying to figure out if the CGI kraken was supposed to be doing a bit. It wasn't. And yet — there's a scene at the 40-minute mark, a wedding interrupted by tentacles, that's genuinely the funniest thing we saw all year, entirely by accident. The jury argued about this one longer than any other film on the ballot. In the end, Worst Picture needed to go to something that failed on purpose less charmingly. Consider this the film we'll defend at parties.